Wednesday, April 20, 2011

Homework Frustrations

Sorry I don't have a picture for you today. It's been a busy, frustrating day. Riley had one last project to finish for tomorrow, and he also had his regular therapy appointment and Quinn had a baseball game. Kevin had something at work to attend, so I asked my mom to help me shuttle kids about town. She met us at Riley's therapist's office and took Quinn to his game. I waited for Riley and then had to drive him all the way back home so that he could finish his project. I then turned around and went to Quinn's baseball game, leaving Riley to work on his project until Kevin could get home and oversee it.

I found out today that Riley has not been turning in his English homework. He does the damn homework every frickin' night! We make sure to check his agenda, and check that he has done the homework for ALL of his classes. It is always done-we make sure of it. We then make sure he puts the items into the correct folders and then into his backpack, ready for school. I then remind him and remind him of it. We do this every night. Imagine my surprise when I looked in his English folder today and found at least a week's worth of completed English homework! I asked Riley about it, but he couldn't recall if he turned it in or not, so I emailed the teacher. Nope, he hasn't turned it in. Crap. Again we reviewed the procedures for turning in homework. All he has to do is come in the classroom, take the homework out, and put it on his desk. Then he is to copy down the next night's homework, as the teacher collects it. He forgets to take it out-and this is where you can really see the disorder. It does NOT occur to him to do what the other kids are doing. Example, kids will see what they are supposed to do, based on what the other kids are doing, and they will get what is needed-even my 2nd graders can do this. Riley's brain doesn't work that way. It never occurs to him to look at what the other kids are doing because he's so focussed in his world. It is so very frustrating! How am I supposed to get it through to him that he needs to get the homework out and TURN it IN! It's crazy! He spends the time doing the homework, and redoing it if we think he needs to make adjustments, so why isn't he turning it in???? He is losing a privilege for this. I wonder when he will care about his school work? IF he will care? I told him tonight that his dad and I are working very hard to help him out, but that he has to do his part by turning the damn homework IN! Just maddening.

Also frustrating me today? The fact that Riley is so mean to Quinn. I was still angry about the homework, so I unleashed on him today, after he had Quinn in tears. I am sick of the mean things he says to Quinn, and the tone of voice he uses. I understand that Quinn is the one person in the world that Riley can stand up to, but I can't have Quinn growing up thinking Riley was the meanest brother around. I know I have to handle it, but I am searching for ways. Quinn had a rough day at school today, and Riley just kept at him and kept at him until he finally got Quinn to cry. Last week Quinn got so mad at Riley that he didn't want to even sit near him, or be around him. It's got to be so frustrating for Quinn, and I so want to help him understand. If I could ever get Riley in for proper testing, perhaps someone would be able to HELP ME with these issues!

I'm done bitching now. Thanks. Tomorrow is a new day, and spring break starts on Friday. We are all just so very tired.

1 comment:

  1. Julie, that sounds so frustrating! To me it seems like a reasonable thing to involve the teacher in teaching Riley to turn in the homework. This teaching has to happen more in the moment, not later at home. I think if you emphasize that your goal is for him to remember to turn it in himself (not that the teacher would do it for him all the time) you can get the teacher's support on that. I don't know exactly how things work in the classroom, but it seems like you and the teacher could come up with a strategy for reminding Riley to turn stuff in. Once turning things in is part of his routine, the teacher could gradually reduce giving reminders. I hope this helps!

    Cathy

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